Saturday, June 03, 2006


so today was an awesome day. we woke up early and got chores done. then the girls went to the bishop's to do some yard work to earn money for girls camp and lindsay and i went to our friends wedding. the wedding was an all day (and really beautiful) affair. we had arranged with 3 friends to help us with the kids. the idea was that they would work to earn the money they need for camp. it was good.

they visited their mom, went swimming, did some yard work. a great summer saturday.

we didn't get home from the wedding until 10:pm. the girls were at our other friend's house watching "the princess bride".

as we got into the car we asked for a recount of the day. paulette immediately told us that her aunt shirley was at the nursing home when they went to visit their mom. then paulette relayed a message from shirley to us, that went a little like this: "they have got to realize that you are black and don't have white people hair and that you have to get your hair done regularly..." it continued on about how horrible their hair looked etc.

I FLIPPED OUT! the post dedicated to shirley hasn't happened yet, and i am not sure how that will go, but suffice it to say that shirley is in no possition to be critizing our parenting skills. additionally, the reason their hair is not in braids or rows or something is because the doctor (an african-american woman) told us to keep their hair natural and not put it into braids etc. it needs to be natural so that they can heal.

i called shirley furious. i asked her to not communicate through the girls. that we are doing the best that we can. that it is true that we don't know how to "do black hair" but we are learning and we are doing all that we can to help these girls get healthy. lets not forget that the hair fungus is a function of neglect. i told her that i wanted her to talk to both of the kids and straighten out what she had said and apologize. she did without hesitation.

the girls were shocked to hear anyone talk to their aunt the way i talked to her. she is THE matriarch and no one questions her authority.

at least not until now...



Rachel Cousin said...

Wow, Lindsay! You guys have had some "adventures" (for lack of a better word). I'm impressed with all you've done for these girls. It takes a really strong person to take on that kind of responsibility. I'll try to keep up on your blogs and if there's any way I could help out, let me know. Norah has my contact information.

Rachel Cousin (from Norah and Mike's wedding)

k8 said...

you have got to be kidding me! aunt shirley is really concerned about HAIR!!?!?!?

KamilahNYC said...

Next time I am in town, I will come over and check out their hair. I think everyone has an "Aunt Shirley"...good luck with her!